i'm not sure how to put this in words but...i'll try

I said: Lord i love You with all my heart..i'll give You my all..my everything..use me Lord!
He said: "If you love me, obey my commandments"

This part reminded me of Jesus' command to His disciples to preach the gospel to every creature

Jesus asked: Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?
Peter answered: Yes, Lord You know i love You
Jesus then said: Feed my lambs
Jesus asked again: Simon son of John, do you love me?
Peter answered the same answer
Jesus then said: Take care of my sheep
Jesus asked for the third time : Simon son of John, do you love me?
Peter then aswered the same answer again
Jesus then said: Feed my sheep

This conversation Jesus had with Peter is as if i'm playing Peter's role in John 21:15-17

I asked: what kind of ministry do You want me to be in Lord..street evangelising? this is SO out of my comfort zone Lord and am i really up to it? DO I REALLY have to tell them about You? i don't think they want to have anything to do with who they so-called the almighty or some"supreme-being-out-there-somewhere"..let alone having a relationship with You..they'll reject You again and again..and it breaks my heart..and Yours too Lord so should we just safely wait for them to search for YOu and then we can tell them about You..?

He said: you must also tell others about me...because you have been with me from the beginning

wow..from the beginning..our purpose..our assignment..was to tell our lost brothers and sisters about HIm..that they have to believe in Jesus in order to come back to where their real home is. i'll try to continue tomorrow..too tired now..ciao